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Here’s how to make friends as an introvert

Making friends seems easy, right? You attend an event, socialise and talk to new people. And by the end of the night, you have loads of new buddies.

If you’re an introvert though, the thought of socialising may make you cringe. And sadly, this can make it difficult for you to make friends. Generally, introverts crave deep relationships with a small circle of people and struggle to socialise. This is unlike extroverts, who thrive when they’re around large groups.

Many introverts end up lonely because they’d rather avoid social situations that make them feel stressed out. If you’re an introverted student, don’t worry. There are ways that you can make friends without attending a party.

Start with your own circle

If you find parties or other gatherings daunting, why not look at your own circle? Chances are you have some acquaintances who are worth getting to know better. Go through your phone and decide which contacts are interesting. Shoot them a text or talk to them more to decide if they’d make a good friend. When you’re brave enough, suggest something simple – like a coffee.

Find your people

If you go to a party or bar, you’re unlikely to find many introverts. But, if you go to places you enjoy, you’re more likely to find your future bestie. Choosing a place that relates to your hobby or passions is also a good idea. For example, a writing or photography class. Also, being in a place you’re comfortable in means you’ll feel more comfortable too. So, hit up your favourite space or grab a friend to make it an introvert party.

Be patient

If you’re serious about making friends, understand that it’ll take time and effort. Let go of the idea that it’s going to happen overnight. . At first, it’s going to be uncomfortable because as with all relationships, comfort and trust need to be earned. Throughout the process, remind yourself that you’ve got to start somewhere. It will be worth it in the end when you find your new bestie.

Use your superpower

Introverts are known for being excellent listeners.. Casually ask potential friends questions about themselves. Ask what they’re doing this weekend, what’s new in their life and about their hobbies. You will need to talk about yourself too, but don’t keep the spotlight on yourself. Using your listening skills will make them feel special and like they matter.

Assess how you feel

It’s important to choose your friends wisely, and even more so for introverts. How you feel with potential friends says a lot about how the friendship will do in the long-term. Ask yourself: Do you feel drained or energised after hanging out with them? Do they make you feel like hiding out at home for days after seeing them? Overall, they should make you feel good and comfortable to just be yourself.

Schedule meet-ups

Once you find someone who’s a good fit, keep the momentum going so your friendship can bloom. Ask your new friend to hang out once a week, maybe on weekends or after work. A weekly catch-up will help strengthen your bond and will fill otherwise lonely days with something to look forward to. Since there is nothing an introvert dislikes more than last-minute socialising, stick to your diary! Having a social schedule means you’ll feel more comfortable as you’ll know what to expect.